Missing The North

The year was 1999… I had been working for a Medical Brace Company for some 8 1/2 years… About 2 years longer than I should of. And thus, I was completely fried on Corporate America… And Sales… And Cubicles… And Artificial Lighting.

One year prior, I had gotten out of a 8 year relationship as well… Both the Career/Job, and the Relationship, had left me in a Grey Zone… Floating… Sleep Walking through life.

From the moment she left, I started to wake… Awake from this Stream of Years where I absolutely did not pursue any of the things/dreams that I wanted to.


Awake… First thing I did was go out and buy a Computer, and then a New Electric Guitar, then a New Acoustic Guitar… And at last… A Black Jeep… Something I had wanted for years, and simply couldn’t afford while supporting two people.

(Looked like this Jeep, accept black, and had a hardtop)

I literally drove the thing off the Sales Floor… It cost way too much money, but I had gotten a roommate which basically cut my rent in half, so I hardly felt the more expensive payment. Plus, I was only supporting one, something I hadn’t done for 8 years.

But this Jeep didn’t come easy, as a month after that relationship ended, before I had bought the Jeep, I went on a road trip to see my Oldest Sister in Northern Arizona… And on the way, I hit a Flash Flood, something I had never seen before, the road simply became a River, you couldn’t even see the road… So I just let off the gas, and slowly moved to the right lane… I did not hit the brakes, as I didn’t want to start to roll or hydroplane… But I ended up rolling, and hydroplaning anyway…

(Pretty much looked like this truck, but without the shell on the back)

WHAM!! Frankly, it was the only reason I got the Jeep… Because my Pickup had 13 thousand worth of damage, and it was only a 17 thousand truck… So you can imagine what that thing looked like… Twisted, and torn… I was goina send a picture of it to my Mom, but after I saw it the next day, as the wreck happened at night, there was no way I wanted her to see that thing. The only reason I didn’t get more messed up in the wreck was 1) I let off the gas, and didn’t use the breaks, so when I rolled, I only rolled twice, lol… I know it sounds bad, but rolling 4 to 6 times would have been much worse… 2) It was a Ford Extra Cab Ranger, and was built like uh… Well, like a truck, lol. No, in all honesty, that thing held up really well… But if I hadn’t have had that extra cab, my head might have gone right through the window behind my head… Ironically, the truck I had before this one, was a Ranger without the extra cab. And 3) As soon as the truck started to roll, I completely relaxed, my body went limp, as I had always heard that people who are asleep in a car crash fair much better, because their muscles are relaxed… A lot of the injuries in accidents are from people tensing up, and thus their muscles and body get all jarred to hell on impact… And/or impacts.

So that’s why I got my Jeep… I needed a new vehicle, and I wasn’t supporting two people anymore, so I could afford it. The other thing I could have spent my money on instead, as I was doing pretty good in sales at that point, was to get like a Condo or something… But I wasn’t going to do that… Because frankly, I was fried on that job, and didn’t want to get tied down to a Condo Payment.

After I got the Jeep, I started a Band… What a blast… Another one of my Dreams… And though I/we never performed live, we rehearsed for months in a practice studio, and it was a blast. That’s really when I did my first bits of Poetry… You see, after that break up, I no way in hell planned on dating anyone… But, of course, love comes when love comes… And I got romantically involved with a very good friend of mine from work… She had also just left a long term relationship, and so the obvious happened, and after a few months of being together, it fell apart.

But it did supply an endless amount of song lyrics, lol

For the next year, my life became one cliche’ after another.

But oh well… What else can you expect from a guy who was coming out of a 4 plus year cloud of greyness…

And so, in August of 1999, a year after the 8 year relationship break up, 11 months after rolling my truck, and 5 months after breaking up with my friend and basically getting my heart smashed… I decided it was time to leave the state.

You see, my brother lived up North in Oregon… He had met his wife in Northern California, moved to Hawaii where she was from, and moved to Oregon after that… Then to Northern California, back to Hawaii, then back to Oregon again… lol Or something like that… He and his wife were basically like gypsies… But at some point during that time, they had a baby boy… And so were settling down in Oregon for a while.

Now my brother and I were really, really, really close when we were young… But because I had been pretty tied up with my long term relationship, and he had moved north and was traveling all over the place with his new wife, we simply didn’t see each other much for a bunch of years… So when he finally settled down, he was constantly calling me, trying to get me to move up to Oregon to be near him and his family.

And once I broke up, rolled my truck, and got my heart broken… I figured it was time to break away from where I had lived pretty much my whole life, and head up north…

To Eugene Oregon

So I absolutely stuffed my Jeep with my stuff, and bought a the Brand New Red Hot Chili Pepper’s Album, Californication, and literally listened to that thing over and over and over again the whole way to Oregon… Man, what a great album

Here, incase you wanta get in the mood, lol

Loved that Album.

They even had a song called Road Trippen on it

I highly recommend buying it, and just playing it over and over again if you decide to hit the road for any reason…

Now Eugene Oregon, I have to tell you, is simply Beautiful Country… It rains there a lot, but I lived in this little room off to the side of the house my brother was  renting, and started to decompress from the previous 9 years of my life… I Wrote, and Wrote, and Wrote… Mostly Film Concepts… And shortly after getting there I went out and bought a really nice Video Camera, and started working on Experimental Films with my brother… It was simply awesome.

And so easy to create when it was raining outside so much of the time… As I arrived there in like November, December of 1999… After a bit, I wanted to get a job, as I was living off of my hard earned 401k money (I do not recommend doing this by the way, lol… I don’t regret it at all, but… Eh, I don’t recommend it, lol) So sadly, it was back to Corporate America… At least for a few months anyway, as I SIMPLY COULDN’T STAND ITTTT!!! Not the job, being in an office again.

But the money helped make the transition to my new home easier anyway… During this time, I reconnected with my brother, which was just awesome… And did hundreds of hours of Experimental Film Work, and tons and tons of Writing… I also did some Painting, but I have to say, it’s not one of my Gifts, lol

After a hand full of months, and a few dozen walks down by the Willamette River which was simply amazing, we ended up renting a 1908 Victorian Home… And that was simply amazing… Oh, it was ran down, nothing fancy, but so damn cool…

And my room was on the second floor, which I simply loved… Every morning my Nephew would run up the stairs, he was like 3 or 4, and dive under my blankets, and hide from the bad guys with me… lol

I lived there with them for many more months, ended up leaving the office job, and got a job at a health market… It didn’t pay a lot of money, but man was I happy…

Every night when I would get home, I’d work on more Experimental Film stuff, and when my brother’s wife and son would go to sleep, he’d come up to my room, and we’d watch some flicks… Or work on some Film stuff.

Also when you went downtown in Eugene, there was this quaint little Coffee House, where musicians played music live… And sometimes we’d all get Chinese, or Indian Food, and then head there to listen to music, get a coffee, and/or a bakery good.

I never thought I’d miss those times so much… My focus was really reconnecting to my brother, starting a film career, and healing from the previous 9 years of my life… All of which I did… But after 9 months of being in Eugene, OR, I started to miss my home, and returned to it.

And now here I sit, some eleven years later, missing my Northern Home.

Which reminds me, I have two or three hundred hours of Video Footage on Hi8 Video Tapes, that I need to have turned into DVD’s, lol

Thanks for Listening/Reading




Other Editorials by DarkJade

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