The Truth – Part II

The Truth

Part One

Part Two

After 8 months of working on experimental filmmaking, basically teaching myself how to make films, I moved back to Southern California

There I began writing a Teleplay (Screenplay for a Television Series) for a Science Fiction Series, called ‘Masters of Mars’

I wrote the First Three Episodes of it, and continued doing Filmmaking with action figures, but also started to make miniature sets

My brother then convinced me to move back to Oregon, once more, this time I told him that I didn’t want to film action figures anymore, I wanted to do a Short Film…

…he said ok

I then moved up there once more, but it was rough… 9/11 had happened several months before, and finding any kind of work, even temporary work, was largely impossible

During my time there, though I was very stressed about money, I wrote my first full written for feature film screenplay, ‘White Jade’…

My plan was to try to sell feature film screenplays, and use the money to produce my own films

I also wrote a play while I was there…

…but in the end, my brother was having serious issues with his marriage, and simply couldn’t make time to work on a Short Film

I suspect the true reason he wanted me to move there, was because he was really struggling in his life

Out of frustration, I sat down one day and wrote a 5 minute Short Film, called my brother, and asked him if I could borrow him for an hour

Then I shot over there, and started to film the short film, feeding him lines as we went

I shot this film in an hour and a half, and though there are shots I would have liked to shoot over, over all I think it got the message across

Here it is

After I shot the footage, I went home and spent 8 to 12 hours Editing it, then submitted it to a Video and Film Festival in New York, and got it in

My brother than got a job in Northern California, and moved away, leaving me there, though I’d moved up there for him

I had no money, but after several months, was finally able to move back to Southern California

I then flew with my Dad to New York to see the Short Film up on the big-ish screen, and seeing it up there made me feel I was at last a Filmmaker

Three months later I ended up in the hospital

I’d stopped taking some medicines when I went to Oregon earlier that year, due to the fact that I couldn’t find money, and lost my insurance

After 10 days of being in the hospital, I was feeling weak, but better

I then moved to Scottsdale Arizona in 2003, to live near my Step Brother, and began writing my next film

This one would be an hour long

But the medical issues I was healing from lead to some trauma in Arizona, which caused PTSD

So I moved back to my mom’s house in Southern California, and rested for a moment

But several months later I moved to Northern California to be near my bro again, but after several severe anxiety attacks, I returned to my mom’s home once more, and realized I just wasn’t going to be able to pursue Filmmaking for a bit

So instead, I picked up the Feature Film Screenplay First Draft I wrote in Oregon two years before, and started Editing/Rewriting the heck out of it…

…poured hundreds of hours into it

Growing it from an 80 page First Draft, to a 123 page Final Draft

I then wrote a Query Letter, and started sending it out to Writing Agents, in hopes to get one to read my screenplay, and hopefully represent me

To no avail

At that point, I decided I needed to take a break from pursuing my dreams for a while, and started playing ‘World of Warcraft’ for the next 4 1/2 years…

…I mean, I played a lot

I loved it, don’t regret it, but wasn’t really going out of the house because of the anxiety which basically changed into a fear of anxiety (Panic Disorder)

Basically I didn’t want to go out, not because I had anxiety, but because I feared having an anxiety attack when I was out

It had happened several times by now, and it made me feel out of control emotionally, and caused me to have ‘Fight or Flight’ instincts come up because of the PTSD, even though I wasn’t in any actually danger

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