It’s Good to Feel Sad Sometimes: Here’s Why

Posted in Life with tags on February 2, 2023 by darkjade68

Original Article Can Be Found HERE (I’ve only posted the first part of the article below, to see it all click the link)

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Sadness is integral to the human experience — so why do we often push it away?

Sadness probably isn’t one of your favorite feelings, but it’s still a valuable emotion, and it’s OK to be sad. While it might be uncomfortable, letting sadness in can come with many benefits.

It’s common to label sadness as a “negative” emotion and avoid it as a result. You might find yourself using distractions, like browsing your phone or snacking when you’re not hungry, to keep that heavy feeling in your chest at bay.

Sometimes, avoiding sadness can even look like lashing out when someone brings up a topic that’s sensitive to you.

Avoiding sadness can also come with a side helping of toxic positivity. Toxic positivity is when you banish difficult emotions and only acknowledge more favorable ones, like happiness. It can seem helpful, but toxic positivity may cost you your authenticity and take an emotional toll.

While running from sadness can keep you stuck in a rut, acknowledging and processing it can make it easier to move forward meaningfully in life.

Six reasons it’s OK to be sad

Letting yourself feel sad doesn’t mean wallowing in self-pity. Choosing sadness brings a variety of benefits. For instance, it means accepting the reality of your current emotions and taking the first step toward processing them.

It connects you with others

One function of sadness is that it encourages others to treat you with empathy, according to a 2018 review of research. This means that embracing sadness could connect you with compassion and care when you need it most.

2015 study found that expressing sadness can also bring people together by creating a shared sense of values and belonging to a group. Many cultures even have specific practices and rituals for expressing sadness as a community.

Participating in a communal expression of sadness, such as attending a memorial service or vigil, is one way sadness could help you feel less alone.

It helps you process complexity

Sometimes sadness causes you to seek space from others instead — and this may actually be another benefit.

Research from 2018 suggests that when sadness urges you to disconnect, you’re experiencing a protective mechanism meant to keep you safe during a vulnerable time. A bit of solitude when you’re feeling sad may help your body and mind cut down on unnecessary stimuli. This can give you space to process intense or complex feelings.

It’s part of grieving

Sadness is an aspect of grief, the natural process for responding to and managing loss. Experts suggest that sadness may be a phase in the cycle of grief that promotes reflection. This means that sadness may actively help you make sense of the strong feelings that grief can bring.

Expressing sadness by crying can also signal to those around you that you’re experiencing grief and could use support and understanding.

It allows you to adapt

Sadness can help you respond to the thoughts and feelings it has helped you process.

Rumination, when you go through the same thoughts over and over, is often seen as an unhelpful behavior. But when it comes with sadness, it may actually help you come to terms with letdown or loss and build a new strategy for moving through it, according to a 2018 review.

Sadness is also connected to post-traumatic growth, which can happen after difficult life circumstances. Post-traumatic growth could lead to a deeper sense of spirituality or motivation to enact positive change.

It can teach you about yourself

Because sadness is often a response to feelings of failure or loss, it’s also a reminder of what you care deeply about and of the qualities that make you human. These include your:

  • values, goals, and beliefs
  • capacity to love
  • interdependence with others

2016 research reviewTrusted Source suggests that sadness may allow you to not only dig deeper into the conundrum at hand, but also expand your self-knowledge.

It can lead to more satisfaction

In some cases, sadness may be a sign that something in your life, like a relationship or job, isn’t working out.

For example, lingering sadness and depression can be signs of burnout. Burnout is an indication that your energy is being depleted and it’s time for a change. Tuning in to that feeling can be the first step toward making a change that serves you.

When is sadness really something else?

Sadness is a natural emotion. But if you experience it for long periods or it gets in the way of your daily functioning, it could be a sign of a mental health condition like depression.

Here’s how to tell the difference between sadness and depression.

How to feel sad without getting overwhelmed

It can seem all too easy to become overwhelmed by sadness. You might worry letting sadness in will mean it’s there to stay.

Self-care that minimizes distraction and maximizes mindfulness could help you get in touch with sadness without losing yourself in it.

Journal

Writing down your feelings could help you tap into sadness in a manageable way. For instance, a small 2016 study found journaling helped registered nurses process negative emotions associated with their work.

Setting aside some quiet time to journal might help if you’re having trouble getting in touch with buried feelings of sadness. As you write, you might imagine your sadness surfacing and moving through you and onto the page.

Keep a broad perspective

The right perspective and some self-compassion could help you manage the uncomfortable aspects of sadness and stay present with them.

You might imagine your emotions as weather — just like storm clouds, sadness will eventually pass. It can help to remember that emotions are temporary if sadness brings up fears that you’ll never feel happy again.

2020 study also suggests self-compassion may help when managing depression and deep feelings of sadness. Self-compassion involves maintaining a perspective of kindness and nonjudgment toward yourself.

Meditate

Meditation could help you regulate, or manage, emotions like sadness constructively. A small 2019 study found that meditation that focused on positive emotions was especially effective at helping people regulate emotion.

On top of helping you manage sadness, meditation could lower its intensity and make the process of moving through it feel less overwhelming.

Want to know more? Here are some kinds of meditation that can help with depression and sadness.

Talk it out

Expressing sadness to an empathetic loved one can be a great way to process it, allowing you to feel less alone.

If you’ve experienced loss or a setback alongside another person, it may feel even more natural to share your sadness with them. Setting aside time to speak candidly about disappointment or grief may foster a sense of closeness with that person.

Talking through feelings of sadness with a mental health professional is another option. Therapy could help you confront feelings of sadness and offer support as you unravel them.

Tofu, Avo & A Couple Tots

Posted in Writing on January 29, 2023 by darkjade68

You don’t need a lot of Tots, just a couple (I had 5 I think)

Tofu cooked in Olive Oil with Mushrooms & Avocado

You don’t need a lot of Juice either (85% water/including ice, 15% Juice)

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The Paladin EnLarra

Posted in Dungeons And Dragons, Fantasy, Fiction, Writing on January 26, 2023 by darkjade68

Doragon Kishu (Dragon Rider & Paladin)

(Art by ketunhaska)

The Paladin EnLarra

by DORAGON

Part I

Her horse MERA burst through the summer sands that brushed across both her gold & white hooded form, as well as her steed’s, as she leaned forward to make her horse go faster…

‘So many lies were told this night,’ she thought to herself as she did her best to stay focused on the hoof catching terrain

‘Especially about my sister.’

The rider would keep heading east for two to three more hours before stopping at a small oasis near the edge of the desert she road to feed her horse…

She dismounted & tied Mera to a nearby palm tree where she dipped down and drank

Meanwhile the rider pulled back her hood to reveal a fair skinned girl in her twenties with extremely light blue green eyes & white golden hair

Her name is ENLARRA…

…her last…

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Keep Dreaming

Posted in Dreams, Film, Filmmaker, Filmmaking, Films of Meaning, Life with tags on January 22, 2023 by darkjade68

Director Robert Altman ‘The Company’

The Rock

Posted in Life, Poem, Poetry, The Written Word, Writer, Writing on December 28, 2022 by darkjade68

The Rock

It isn’t easy being strong…

…when something’s going wrong

The one’s that know and love you…

They seem to move along

But it’s hard…

Hard to let it go

Impossible…

To crumble and fold

PICTURE – Black Rock Yellow

DarkJade-

This Year’s Posting In Pictures (2022)

Posted in Climate Change, Climate Crisis, Cooking, Covid, D & D, Democracy, DORAGON Adventures, Dungeons And Dragons, Entertainment, Environment, Fiction, Food, Life, Poetry, Politics, Professional Dungeon Master, Story, The Written Word, Vegan, Vegan Cooking, Vegan Recipes, Writer, Writing on December 23, 2022 by darkjade68

Vegan Dishes 2022

Posted in Cooking, Vegan, Vegan Cooking, Vegan Recipes on December 23, 2022 by darkjade68

Dark Cloak (Chapter II) Night One

Posted in Dark Cloak, Fantasy, Fiction, Story, The Written Word, Writer, Writing on December 23, 2022 by darkjade68

Dark Cloak

by DarkJade

Chapter 1

Chapter II – Night One

Ten hours later, the Mage Ethan Corlioso awakens, his black, silver edged bangs falling over his eyes

He winces in pain, then lifts the blanket revealing his bandaged torso

He stands raising his hand and his cloak and staff fly to him

He walks slowly, and with a bit of a body limp, but makes his way to the door which opens for him

Down the hallway, then down the stairs several floors he makes his way below the land line of his tower…

…down, down down until he reaches a door with a gargoyle handle which he grabs and it flares purple and blue magic

He speaks some barely audible arcana words and it opens

He makes his way passed many empty cells, until he comes across a figure sitting in the the dark with red glowing eyes

‘Long time…’ speaks the harrowing, yet somehow alluring voice

Ethan summons a stool from across the way, and sits on it some three feet from the cell

‘Not so long,’ he replies

A striking face, with shoulder length white hair, leans into the dim torch light as the figure’s red eyes go to black, ‘You must be desperate.’

Ethan smiles, ‘How are you Agmythos, my old friend.’

Agmythos smiles a bit,’I’ve been better…’

Ethan winces once more and grabs at his side.

Agmythos looks to Ethan’s side, then into his eyes, ‘That old dragon getcha…’

Ethan grimaces and nods, ‘It will heal soon enough.’

‘But there’s something more,’ speaks Agmythos

‘Yes… Well… Lets just say he wasn’t himself…,’ replies Ethan

‘In fact, he wasn’t a ‘he’ at all,’ he finishes

‘His apprentice has seized the Dragon’s body, eh,’ speaks Agmythos

DONG DONG DONG, suddenly the tower entry bells ring, indicating someone is at its’ door

‘Blast,’ speaks Ethan as he leans up against his staff, ‘Another time,’ and makes his way out of the cell room

Art Vampire

Dark Cloak

Posted in Dark Cloak, Fantasy, Fiction, Story, The Written Word, Writer, Writing on December 22, 2022 by darkjade68

Dark Cloak

by DarkJade

Chapter One – The Magic

That Night

Sputtering blood, the middle aged man enters the dark chamber with flashes of blue and purple magic behind him…

…the door closes as he falls over his desk and passes out

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The next morning the sun blares through the tower window filling the mage’s chamber with light…

…still on the floor is the Dark Cloaked figure

Suddenly a young man opens the chamber doors with a thick metal key, and is bewildered by what he comes upon

‘Master, are you alright…’ he helps his Master to his feet, removing the dark cloak from him, and laying him on the bed

A young girl then enters with a small pitcher of water, ‘Is he alright?’

‘Just give me the water and go!’ the boy spats at her, as she turns and rushes out of the room closing the door behind her

‘You shouldn’t talk to her that way,’ a gravely voice comes from the bed as the man’s eyes slowly open, revealing two dark blue pearly eyes

‘Master, thank the gods you’re ok,’ the boy exclaims as he hugs him.

‘Careful now boy, I’m not that alright,’ they both laugh.

‘Now go apologize to Percell,’ the man insists, and the boy quickly leaves the room.

The man then gazes out the bright window as his eyes glow white he sees into another land…

…a snow filled land where a great white dragon sits upon a rocky mountain growling and shooting its’ icy breath into the air above it.

ART – Dark Cloak

‘I Died Once’ & ‘Mady’s Storm’ (Coming Of Age Novellas I Wrote) 2 In A Series

Posted in Fiction, I Died Once, Mady's Storm, Novella, Writer, Writing with tags on December 16, 2022 by darkjade68

In 2011 & 2012 On this very blog, I wrote my first ever Novellas, ‘I Died Once’ & ‘Mady’s Storm’

These are the first two in the ‘Mady’ Series of Novellas

If you’d like to get them for someone for Christmas or Hanukkah Etc., Amazon Prime can still get them there!

‘I Died Once’ – Mady is a fifteen year old girl who is desperately unhappy with her life. Living with her mother, and the mythical shadows of her father. After an abrupt tragedy, this young girl is thronged head first into a great life change, or second life, as her reality shifts from a grey dream state existence, into one of great color.

‘Mady’s Storm’ – “Mady’s Storm” Is The Sequel To “I Died Once”. It’s Eight Years Later… And Mady Must Deal Directly, And Abruptly With Self Identity, And Becoming A Woman.

Happy Holidays!

DarkJade-